Wednesday, January 30, 2008

A Day Away

Every week I take a set of meds that leave me feeling nauseous, etc., so I have had a day away from painting. My thoughts though are full of what I would like to paint next. As my mind conjures up these visions, it also brings with it fear. The fear that I don't know enough to paint the subject; the fear that it will end up being one of the worst things I've ever painted; the real fear being a lack of knowledge or skill to even draw what I envision.

I'm learning to call these fears my thorns. Thorns to spur me on to try, to keep learning and while going through all the processes, enjoying each one. So yes, I shake a little with fear and maybe that is the wiggly line on the paper. I know that if I keep going, the wiggly line will become smoother and I will become so involved in the process that the fear will be forgotten, until the next time.

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